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Bob’s Holiday Office Party is an outrageously fun and funny 80 minutes of very non-
conventional Christmas hijinks, though probably not for everyone’s tastes.   For the 
uninitiated, the following paragraphs will serve as a preview of Bob’s R-rated 
humor. But beware.  Spoilers abound!

Welcome to Bob Finhead’s 12th annual holiday office party, taking place as 
always in his E-Z Insurance Agency office in Neuterburg, Iowa. Bob (Rob Elk) is the 
kind of insurance agent who’s happy to backdate your policy in exchange for 
apple butter, especially if you’re his mom.  He’s also the inventor of a remote 
control toilet flusher, a whistling meat thermometer, and others that, he hopes, will 
allow him to sell his business and go to Inventors’ School.

First to visit Bob tonight is alcoholic Sheriff Joe Walker (Joe Keyes), who proceeds 
immediately to visit the office bathroom.  No matter that the door is off its hinges 
so that anyone can see Sheriff Joe doing his business. He’s like family to Bob so he 
just sits himself down and takes a dump (his word, not mine).  This is where Bob’s 
remote control toilet flusher comes in handy.

Sheriff Joe has some big news for Bob. “I finally joined AA,” he announces proudly, 
“so I’m off the beer.” He then adds, “But if you’ve got some whiskey, that’d be 
okay.” Fortunately Bob does, and Joe takes his first (but not last) swig of the 
evening. Could the whiskey be responsible for the voices Joe hears? “They’re a lot 
louder during the holidays,” he confesses.

Mayor Ray Mincer (Danny Schmitz), a platinum blond mincer if there ever was one, 
pays Bob a brief visit to find out if his wife has said anything to Bob “about the 
Blueboy magazine or the dildos under the bed.” Then, as quickly as he arrived, Ray 
is gone (though fear not, he will be back.)

Next to show up is Elwin Beewee (Kyle Colerider-Krugh), in town “to spend the 
holidays with mother and then put her in a home.”  Elwin, a former resident of 
Neuterburg, has overcome a litany of woes in the years since he left town 
including, among others, stuttering, acne, and a spastic colon which led everyone 
in town to call him “Stinky” and make his life a living hell.

What would Bob’s Holiday Office Party be without a visit from the Johnson triplets 
(Maile Flanagan, Melissa Denton, and Linda Miller)?  Last year they were twins (La 
Voris and La Donna), but for Christmas 2007 they’ve miraculously become triplets, 
the third being LaWayne, who happens to look a lot like last year’s La Donna.  The 
Triplets are not identical, by the way, and in fact come in three sizes: small, 
medium, and large. Oh, and from the way they talk, you can tell that Neuterburg 
must be Minnesota adjacent, “you betcha. Oh yah!”  The triplets, who complete 
each other’s sentences when not speaking in unison, have brought along an 
“appetizer tree,” an inverted cone wrapped in foil and adorned with olives and 
cheese cubes on toothpicks.  There’s still almost a year before the 2008 Presidential 
elections, so “we can sleep good for one more year,” they proclaim. Hopefully, 
though, things in Washington won’t change much, because, they declare, “if we 
change, the terrorists win.”

Unlike AA member Sherrif Joe, the triplets are not about to give up their beer.  In 
fact, they’ll “decide who the designated driver is after we get drunk.”  And in a 
salute to Alfred E. “What me worry?” Newman, the triplets declare that this Global 
Warming the liberal media is always talking about is a bunch of hogwash, just like 
Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, and evolution!

But who wants to talk about serious stuff when there’s a party going on? The 
triplets long-haired nephew Marty (Craig Anton) does, showing up on Bob’s 
doorstep to file an insurance claim. “Is it considered a moving violation if the car I 
hit wasn’t moving?” wonders “My Other Car is a Bong” Marty.

Guess whose car he hit?  Could it belong to Roy Mincer’s space cadet of a wife 
Margie (Maria Bamford), who shows up with her blonde 70s shag freshly 
highlighted? Possibly, as somebody has recently hit her Chrysler LeBaron. It 
probably doesn’t belong to recent State Mental Hospital patient Carol (Ann 
Randolph), here to sing her yearly musical composition.  This year’s ditty is about 
her philandering husband, the town pastor, who is fond of making house calls to 
various female parishioners, each with her “ass up in the air waiting for my husband 
to enter from the rear.  But that’s okay,” she sings, as she accompanies herself on 
the guitar, “I’m not complaining,” and then exits, perhaps to entertain at another 
party?

A very tipsy Santa (Tom  Carey) arrives next, accompanied by Carol’s truly 
indescribable twin sister Brandy (Randolph again), who can’t seem to keep her 
micro-miniskirt pulled down over her crotch. (Not to worry. In the course of the 
evening, every female partygoer’s skirt will somehow rise above waist level, 
exposing plenty of panty hose runs and panties.)

At some point or other, Roy Mincer returns, wearing a powder blue tuxedo, but 
Timmy Schmidt is nowhere to be seen, even though his name is listed last among 
the Cast of Characters (in order of appearance). Quel disappointment, as it was 
Timmy that Roy experimented with at age 8 and Iwould have enjoyed meeting 
him as an adult (portrayed by the absent Frank Coniff).

What would an office party chez Bob be without some dancing, as Elwin joins the 
triplets for a four-way slow dance, which ends with each grabbing and fondling his 
or her neighbors’ posteriors until they collapse in a heap on the floor? What would 
an office party chez Bob be without stolen kisses between Bob and his secret 
paramour, the very married (but clearly unsatisfied by mincing Roy) Margie 
Mincer?  What would an office party chez Bob be without Elwin’s attempt to get 
revenge for all the wrongs done to him as a child? And finally, what would an 
office party chez Bob be without Bob’s threatening to close his business and leave 
town, and Margie, behind?

Bob’s Holiday Office Party was written by Keyes and Elk and directed by Justin 
Tanner, whose own outrageous plays seem almost understated by comparison.  
Gary Guidinger designed the set and lighting, both excellent.  The cast is made up 
of Bob’s Holiday Office Party vets, and restraint is clearly (and happily) not a word 
in their acting vocabulary

So there, in more or less a nutshell, you have the 12th Annual production of Bob’s 
Holiday Office Party.  (Don’t worry that I’ve given too much away. The above 
synopsis was but a hint of the truly outrageous shenanigans which have ensued 
every year for the past 12.) If you’re a stickler for decency, you’re probably not a 
member of Bob’s Holiday Office Party’s target audience.  If, on the other hand, 
you’re like me, you’ll enjoy, laugh, chuckle, guffaw, and occasionally gasp at the 
antics of the wild and crazy bunch that have assembled in Bob’s office.  Last  
night’s audience certainly did, and doubtless many have returned year after year 
(each year it’s in a new venue). I attended my first office party last year at the 
Zephyr, and I expect I’ll be back, though somewhere else, in 2008. I have 
standards of decency, but hey, I don’t mind bending them once a year!

The Lounge Theatre, 6201 Santa Monica Blvd., Los Angeles. 
www.bobsofficeparty.com

–Steven Stanley
December 13, 2007
Photos: Michelle Pederson